Reviews Review: ‘Silent Blood Night’ Feels Like a Throwback to 70’s Sexploitation Published 11 months ago on February 10, 2018 By Gareth Paterson Share Tweet Silent Blood Night is to horror what ‘The Room’ is to drama. It is laughably terrible. The “actors” (for lack of a better word) all deliver their English dialogue in hilariously awkward Austrian accents incapable of pronouncing “v” correctly. This gives the film such a bizarre feel. It’s almost as if the whole thing is a joke, perhaps an homage to ‘Allo, Allo’. But the filmmakers don’t seem self-aware enough for this to be the case. Apparently it was released in 2006 despite having very early digital picture quality akin to VHS. It feels like a throwback to 70’s sexploitation. The philosophy behind the scenes seems to be “we need more T&A!” The overuse of scantily clad actresses is so desperate and excessive that it seems like self-parody. I’d explain the plot but there isn’t one. The nonsensical script made me feel like my mind was being pushed through a cheese grater and into a trash bin. The pacing drags on terribly. It was quite a struggle to make it to the end. It was very tempting to turn it off halfway through and write my review regardless. No one would have known. Unfortunately I decided to be honest and watch all 84 crap-tastic minutes. It’s time I’ll never get back. Without the unintentional comedy and some over the top Troma style violence it would be unwatchable. I feel sorry for everyone behind this movie. They tried their best to make their own Austrian version of an American horror film. They were limited by a low budget, outdated equipment and an incompetent cast. They made Silent Blood Night as a serious horror movie. It did make me scream, only with laughter. Why would anyone make such a ridiculously bad movie? I smell a ‘Springtime for Hitler’ style money laundering scheme. It has to be the only explanation, surely. I’ll end my review with a quote from someone else’s. I went on IMDb to get some background information, hoping some context might help me better understand and process the garbage I had just watched. Instead I found a very accurate description of Silent Blood Night by one user: “It looks like it was filmed by a horse and edited with a potato masher.” Related Topics: Up Next Review: ‘Hellraiser: Judgement’ Gives Promise for the Franchise to Continue Don't Miss Review: Lionsgate’s ‘Jigsaw’ is One of the Best ‘Saw’ Sequels in Years Advertisement You may like Click to comment Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *Comment Name * Email * Website Facebook Advertisement Dark Universe Presents https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0T8C3JIJLA&t=22s Twitter Follow @DUHDNews Advertisement Latest Popular Videos News18 hours ago Anne Hathaway Lands Role as the Grand High Witch in New Adaptation of ‘The Witches’ Blu-Ray & DVD21 hours ago Pet Sematary Getting 30th Anniversary Limited Edition Steelbook 4K Ultra HD (UK) Blu-Ray News22 hours ago (Video) Breaking: ‘Ghostbusters 3’ Coming in (2020) Teases Return of the Classic Ecto-1 News2 days ago Horror Short ‘Knock Knock Knock Knock’ Homages Dario Argento, Mario Bava and Lucio Fulci News4 days ago Kane Hodder is Back in New Horror Film ‘Knifecorp’ With Felissa Rose News6 days ago Michael Myers Watches Allyson as She Encounters a Hanging Dog in Haunting Deleted Scene News4 weeks ago Horror Legend Dee Wallace Has Joined the Cast of Cuyle Carvin’s ‘Dolls’ News3 weeks ago Deleted Scene from ‘Halloween’ Reveals What Happened to Cameron Blu-Ray & DVD7 days ago Tom Holland’s ‘Fright Night’ Gets an Unlimited US Blu-Ray Release from Sony News3 weeks ago New Line’s ‘A Nightmare on Elm Street’ Reimagining is Still Happening News22 hours ago (Video) Breaking: ‘Ghostbusters 3’ Coming in (2020) Teases Return of the Classic Ecto-1 News2 days ago Horror Short ‘Knock Knock Knock Knock’ Homages Dario Argento, Mario Bava and Lucio Fulci News6 days ago Michael Myers Watches Allyson as She Encounters a Hanging Dog in Haunting Deleted Scene News2 weeks ago Jackson Robert Scott is Possessed by an Evil Entity in the New Trailer for ‘The Prodigy’ News2 weeks ago Official Trailer for ‘Blood Bound’ Plays With Dark Magic Advertisement Trending Horror Lists3 years ago The Many Different Michael Myers Masks Used In Halloween: H20 News2 years ago Todd McFarlane Makes An Announcement on His ‘Spawn’ Script News2 years ago Photo of Doug Bradley Back in Pinhead Makeup for First Time in 12 Years! News2 years ago George A. Romero to Bring ‘Pint of the Living Dead’ to Ottawa ComicCon Blu-Ray & DVD2 years ago Arrow Video Bringing J.S. Cardone’s 1982 Slasher ‘The Slayer’ to Blu-Ray! News2 years ago Official “Friday the 13th: The Game” Release Date Finally Announced! News2 years ago New Photos From Adam Ripp’s Demonic Horror Flick ‘Devil’s Whisper’ News2 years ago Spike’s “The Mist” New Series Trailer Features Gore and Scares!